queer

Incite! Celebrates Bisexuality

London’s premier LGBTQ poetry night marks Bi Visibility Month with an evening dedicated to spoken word art that goes both ways.

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Incite!@The Phoenix is the home of  LGBTQ+ poetry as diverse as we are, hosted by LGBT Poet Laureate Trudy Howson and taking place monthly in an iconic west end venue.

September’s Incite! celebrates the B in LGBT with performances from  Bella Cox and Dan Webber as well as an open mic slot. Admission free. 13th September, Phoenix Artists Club, WC2H.

 

 

“I feel tolerated, but very rarely more than that” – Being Bi on the Scene

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Bisexual people were very nearly edged out of the Pride parade all together; a Guardian columnist (who can tell Divine Gender Identity without asking, even in dimly-lit London clubs) told a group of self-identified bisexual and queer people to stop dancing and kissing so aggressively in a gay space, before writing about it in the national media. 

Exclusion is an experience that is ubiquitous among the bisexual community. As well as the obvious exclusion same-gender attracted people face from heterosexual society, bisexuals often can’t find refuge within LGBTQ created partly by and for them.

Although this phenomena is widely written about in the bisexual community, as is the imbalance of the effects being excluded from society has over being excluded from the feeble resources allotted to the LGBTQ community, it’s important that when these kind of incidents happen we take the time reflect on the prejudices we still… Continue reading

Activist Self-Care (Without the Bubble Bath and Puppies)

downloadGetting involved in bisexual advocacy can be draining. We asked our favourite bi activist from across the pond Miles the Bisexual to tell us how they juggle self care and Getting Shit Done.

Every day, at least one person in my life asks me how I’m doing. My reply is usually some version of “I’m tired,” and they’ll laugh before moving on to other things.

It’s funny to some because I’m a young, active person and I’m supposed to have enough energy to be able to live my life, do my job, and keep up with school/my internship, while still having enough energy to do miscellaneous tasks throughout my day.

When I tell people all the things I do they get more understanding, but I’m still met with the occasional chuckle as I say, “I’m going to work in an hour, I’m going to take a nap”. The truth is,… Continue reading

Coming Out Sucked: How Biphobia Ruined My Coming Out

Screen-Shot-2015-07-07-at-4.10.48-PMComing out in the new millennium is nothing like it was for our predecessors, or we’re told. For them coming out was fearful and even dangerous. For us it should be a joyous occasion. Unfortunately, that’s not always the case. Biphobia, both external and internal, can make coming out just as hard as it ever was. Here, Alex takes us through her journey.

Coming out sucked.

I remember looking out over the black water as I stood in my favourite thinking place – a now eerily empty and quiet park on my way home in Berlin – and saying those three magical words for the first time: I am bisexual.

The thing is, they didn’t feel magical at all. I spat them out like bile rising in my throat. They never soared, they fell right back down on me, paralysing me with fear and dread. Those three words were… Continue reading

“My Sexuality is Relevant to All Parts of My Life”: Parenting while Bisexual

child-355176_1920Being a bi parent is a bit like having a super power. A super power that you really don’t want and which gives you the ability to feel both highly conspicuous and completely invisible. An impostor in Parentland. It feels isolating, but I am certain I am around other queer people on a daily basis who feel just as closeted as I do by the culture that surrounds parenting infants.

I think an identity shift when becoming a parent is quite common, but my sexuality is something that has stayed consistent. I have always been bi, even before I knew that that was what I should call myself. This is not the same for everyone, and that’s perfectly valid too. My sexuality would still matter even if I only started identifying as bi since becoming a parent, or last week, or just yesterday.
Clearly, a children’s play… Continue reading

“If You Wanted Support, You Sent Off For Leaflets” – Finding a Bi Community Before the Internet

associationsWe at Biscuit are constantly surprised how many people simply don’t know that a vibrant and active bisexual community exists in the UK. In the digital age it’s much easier than ever before to connect with people just like you, but what did people do before Google? We asked Marcus Morgan of the Bisexual Index to tell us how he found a community he could call home.

The story of how I came to find the UK bisexual community is one I tell often – if you’ve heard it before I apologise – but it’s a useful example of the subtle, or perhaps not so subtle, biphobia we encounter. Of the way we are delegitimised with the kindest intentions.

I was 21 years old. I worked in a high street insurance brokers on the outskirts of London. I had keys to lock up the shop so I waited… Continue reading

Five Ways You Can Look After Bi Mental Health

mental-health-2019924_960_720Bisexual Mental Health Month (BMHM) may feel long over, but that doesn’t mean you need to wait another year to discuss the sweeping mental health issues facing the bi+ community, or to feel guilt-free about focusing on your own mental health troubles. Here are a few things bi+ people and our allies can do to help safeguard the mental health of the bi+ community.

BMHM is an American campaign that runs throughout March to raise awareness of the mental health issues facing the bisexual community. Due to its online presence, it’s beginning to become internationally observed. But mental health doesn’t isn’t just an issue once a year. Here’s how you can look after yours, and others, all year round.

Find bi+ friendly support

Unfortunately, many bisexual people have difficulty getting support for their mental health issues, despite having some of the worse mental health stats in the LGBT+ community.… Continue reading

San Junipero: A Bisexual Character We Can Actually Admire

Black MirrorBisexual communities don’t have a lot of luck when it comes to our portrayal in films and on television. Often our bisexuality is no more than a plot point to be forgotten when it’s no longer convenient, or rendered in broad stereotypes and insulting cliches. When we find a great depiction of bisexuality in an unlikely place, that deserves celebrating, says Holly.

(I have tried to keep this article as spoiler-free as possible, but if you don’t want to read any hint of the plot, go and watch San Junipero (Black Mirror series 3, episode 4) on Netflix before reading any further!)

Charlie Brooker’s Black Mirror is a show known for exploring the ways that technology might influence our future. The episodes are often dark, and happy endings are rare. I’ll be honest, it’s the last place I expected to find a beautifully nuanced, proudly bisexual character. But when I… Continue reading

Raising Our Standards: How to Get Your Local Council to Fly the Bi Flag

It may only be February, but bi activists up and down the country are already planning their activities for Bi Visibility Day 2017, and getting our flag raised is on most of their agendas. But how do they do it?

After successfully hoisting the bisexual flag over Oxford in 2016, Stephanie talks us through the steps.

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This is a photo of the Bi flag flying proudly over Oxford Town Hall for the first time on Bisexual Visibility Day 2016. Since I began lobbying councillors and senior staff to make this happen I have acquired a detailed and unprecedented knowledge of flag flying protocol at Oxford City Council, (OCC). Not every council is the same, but most are at least similar. Here’s my handy ‘how to’ guide should any other bi activists feel inspired to give it a go.

Realise it will take time

I first had the idea to do… Continue reading

Apologising 101

apologizeWe’re all wrong sometimes. The key to our character lies in how we cope with that. An apology can go a long way to righting our wrongs, but, says El, only if we mean it. 

I had some, shall we say, ‘interesting’ interactions with another writer a few days ago. Now, I can’t say I take criticism perfectly myself, I’m a human being, I get defensive. I think almost everyone does. However, there are ways to deal with criticism, and this writer chose one of the worst. They felt it necessary to engage in a very public, rather unbecoming, debacle that took the form of a facebook thread.

I usually try to stay out of such things unless there’s a potential story in it, or some genuine discussion to be had, as changing the minds of strangers on the internet is generally only worthwhile if one is being paid… Continue reading