We speak to Domestic Abuse Caseworker Sarah Golightley

abusedwomanSarah Golightley, Domestic Abuse Caseworker for the London LGBT Domestic Abuse Partnership, tells Biscuit about the Partnership’s work

“The first few months were fantastic. She was charming, outgoing and I really liked her. But I started to sense things were moving a bit too quickly for me, particularly after she’d insisted we live together. That’s when things started to change for the worse. She started acting jealous around my friends. She’d constantly text me and call me up at work, asking where I’d been. Then she became aggressive. She’d make remarks about telling my family that I’m bi because she knew I’m wasn’t out to them. I sometimes feel intimated being around her, worried that I might accidentally upset her. Other times being with her is great: she apologises, but then something sparks her anger again. Sometimes she blames me for ‘making’ her upset. It feels confusing.”

This is a familiar story of domestic abuse faced by LGBT people. Some of the specifics might change: ‘she’ might be ‘he’ or ‘they’, or it could be abuse from a parent or an ex-partner. Your story could be very different. There may be pressure for you to have sex when you don’t want to. Perhaps there is physical violence, threats or bi-phobic remarks. It can be ongoing abuse, or a one-off incident. It might be hard to even think of it as being abuse at all. Is it that bad? How bad does it have to be before it’s considered to be abusive?

These are all things that the LGBT Domestic Abuse Partnership (DAP) can help you with. We’re here to give you the chance to talk. We can offer you advice and support if you want it but we’re not there to judge you or to force you into making any decisions.
The DAP is a way for LGBT people experiencing domestic abuse to get the maximum amount of help with a minimum amount of hassle. The DAP is open to any LGBT person experiencing domestic violence who is living or working in London. It’s made up of five LGBT agencies who each provide different services, including advice on your safety, housing situation and a counselling service. Everything you tell the DAP is confidential, and all our services are provided free of charge.


To contact the DAP call Broken Rainbow on 0300 999 5428, Galop on 020 7704 2040 or visit www.lgbtdap.org.uk

Photo © Kris Krug

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Charlotte Dingle

Charlotte 'Lottie' Dingle is Biscuit's founding editor. When she's not running freelancing for a diverse bunch of clients ranging from Cosmo to Occupy, she enjoys teaching life drawing, discussing life/the universe/everything with her beloved (but smelly) 22-year-old cat, writing flash fiction for her MA course, getting pretentious tattoos, listening to folk music, creating surrealist art, trying to change the world and drinking red wine. Oh, and My Little Pony. Don't forget My Little Pony. Her favourite biscuits are cream crackers (do they count as biscuits?).

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