“It’s Not Wise To Marry A Bisexual”: Amber Heard & The Continued Acceptance Of Media Biphobia

Amber_Heard_The_Ward_premiereIt’s OK to be violent towards us, though, it seems – maybe you can beat the bi out? Yeah, smack us about a bit. Maybe we’ll learn to follow the straight and narrow. Thank you, US Morning Show commentator Peter Ford, for your helpful words. Whether or not Depp really did attack Heard, the fact remains that her sexuality is entirely irrelevant to the case. But, as ever, if you’re bisexual it usually gets dragged in as an issue anyway… I’d say the alleged physical attack was worth more airplay, but what do I know? I’m just a fickle bisexual. I’ll have changed my mind by tomorrow.

“I probably shouldn’t say this,” Ford insisted during this broadcast yesterday, “but it’s not wise to marry a bisexual”. Ms Heard “travelled across to the other side” to be with with Depp, according to Ford, and Ford made clear his feelings that this “means you will always have problems down the track”. Right. He might be a bit gothy but she definitely didn’t “travel to the other side” to be with him. There are dictionaries. They have definitions of things. They’re useful. Goodness, they even have them online now, those new-fangled beasts! Bisexuality doesn’t involve “switching sides” on a whim.

Rumours that Heard was knocking boots with Cara Delevigne, prompting the split, may or may not be true. A since-deleted tweet from the lovely Evan Rachel Wood (who, incidentally, once kindly ensured that I would die happy by sharing one of my articles on Twitter – LEGEND!!) said the following: “Amber Heard‘s sexuality is only relevant in that bi women are at far greater risk of experiencing intimate partner violence. Bisexuality however is not a reason for violence. It doesn’t mean Heard is somehow immoral or deserving of abuse.” Um, word, basically.

Ford has since “apologised” for his comments, saying that “it’s not wise to marry a bisexual” was a “little throwaway line” and that he even went to the effort of contacting a psychiatrist to find out if every bisexual does actually spend their entire life naked and drenched in the sweat of 50 lovers piled on top of one another, or if we are just like everyone else and come in all kinds of relationship formats. Dear gods.

It was a throwaway line for you maybe, pal, but not for us.

 

 

 

 

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Charlotte Dingle

Charlotte 'Lottie' Dingle is Biscuit's founding editor. When she's not running freelancing for a diverse bunch of clients ranging from Cosmo to Occupy, she enjoys teaching life drawing, discussing life/the universe/everything with her beloved (but smelly) 22-year-old cat, writing flash fiction for her MA course, getting pretentious tattoos, listening to folk music, creating surrealist art, trying to change the world and drinking red wine. Oh, and My Little Pony. Don't forget My Little Pony. Her favourite biscuits are cream crackers (do they count as biscuits?).

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